What do people actually say about me when I’m not in the room?

That question stayed with me somewhere between sessions, networking, coffee refills and trying to look like I had everything under control.

I've been deep in leadership development mode lately: facilitating TBEDC and back-to-back leadership trainings, because apparently, I looked at my calendar and thought, "Yes. More."

But somewhere in the middle of all the madness, that question just landed and wouldn't leave.

What is my leadership brand?

Not the brand in the social media influencer kind of way. Not the polished, curated version. The real one—the one people experience when you walk into a room… and maybe more importantly, the one you leave behind when you're gone.

We talked about perception, trust and consistency. Stuff you probably already know somewhere in the back of your head but that hits differently when you're sitting in a room being asked to reflect on it out loud. At one point, we had to share our personal brand statements with each other.

Honestly? I got a little vulnerable.

I started asking myself:

Am I actually showing up the way I think I am?

Or just the way I hope I am?

Those are two very different things, and I'm not sure I always know the answer.

Something else came up in a different session that stuck with me too: the idea of dressing for the part. Not about power suits or fancy shoes. More about dressing for the role you want, not just the one you already have.

And honestly, I don’t even think it’s really about the clothes.

It’s about intention.

About showing up prepared. Respecting the room. Respecting the people in it. Being mentally present instead of just physically there.

Because people form impressions before we ever speak. They notice energy, preparation, presence… all the little things we think nobody sees.

And maybe that’s part of leadership too.

Presence speaks before you do.

And it isn’t separate from your leadership brand—it IS a part of it. The way you walk in, how prepared you are, whether you’re actually there mentally. People clock all of that before you say a single word.

And that's when it hit me.

Leadership branding isn’t about being polished or perfect anyway.

It’s about consistency.

It's about whether people know what version of you is walking into the room.

And whether that version feels steady enough to trust.

By the end, we had to write our own brand statements. Mine still needs work. Honestly, when I read it out loud, it sounded a little like an Alanis Morissette lyric—very “who wrote this?” energy.

But here’s where I landed:

“I’m fun but fierce, collaborative but decisive, still learning but wise enough to trust my experiences. I believe in humor, hard work, showing up for people and continuing to learn from every experience along the way.”

Is it perfect? Not even close.

Is it finished? Definitely not.

But I think that’s kind of the point.

Because leadership branding isn’t about creating a catchy slogan. It’s about self-awareness. It’s built over time by how consistently your actions, and yes, your presence, match your intentions.

The real work is just paying attention to that gap.

So, I’ll leave you with the same question that started all this:

What do you hope people say about you when you’re not in the room?